|Actual footage from Episode 7|
The release reports that Star Wars: Episode 7 is targeted for release in 2015. No other details about the movie were made public. Because of that, I am forced to fill in the blanks.
Possible Episode 7 scenarios/characters (please note that I am aware of the hundreds of Star Wars books that occur after the original 6 episodes, and the following is probably some kind of nerdy, mom's basement blasphemy against that canon of literature. Deal. With. It.)
- Space Pirates of the Corellian becomes the unofficial title, stars Johnny Depp as a quirky space pirate obsessed with "Black Helmet's" treasure.
- Now that Vader is dead, the Evil Emperor Zurg takes over as the #1 bad guy.
- The movie will be shown in theaters as two versions; "regular" and "karaoke sing-a-ling with that white ball that bounces on the lyrics"
- The Death Star will be remodeled into a giant, gaudy castle. That's no moon...
- The plot will also follow Luke Skywalker's kid, Ben Skywalker as he sings his way through high school. Spinoffs "Endor Musical I, II, and III" to follow.
- Episode Seven stars Taylor Kitsch, and just like every other one of his movies, it totally bombs.
- A Pixar short film is shown before the movie titled: "Star Wars: Revenge of the little lamp thing that got crushed in Toy Story"
- Space Mountain is re-branded as Star Wars Mountain; no changes are made to that archaic ride.
- Jar-Jar Binks plays a very prominent role in all three ensuing movies.
By Aaron Brandt, Star Wars Episode I Racer expert.