Monday, November 24

You went to a Lutheran School if...


Ok, since many of the people that read this blog are part of the Lutheran school system in some way, I decided to post this. I found this list online through various searches. The funny part of this is the fact that it is incredibly true. Note my comments in a different font and color.

You could name every single person in your graduating class
Yep, Kirsten Adams all the way to Teddy Zinc, its true.

You know you are right, and everyone else is wrong. End of discussion.

You can name all 12 of the Concordias, which is good for absolutely nothing, except for maybe this list...as you sit there and attempt to name them all ;)
Wisconsin, Ann Arbor, Chicago, Austin, Seward, Portland, St. Paul, Selma, Irvine, Bronxville. There's really only 10, but you can include the seminaries (Ft. Wayne, St. Louis). OK OK I cheated, but I knew about 7 of them.

St. Louis is considered your "mecca"
I made a pilgrimage as a lad. My padawans are scouring the archives for photographic evidence.

All of your religion teachers have told you something entirely different about the same section of doctrine
Sad but true.

Few of your teachers were actually good at their job, despite being "called".
They said it, not me.

It's impossible to lobby for the removal of any teacher, called or not called.
Has a teacher ever been fired? Its an honest question, if you know of one, please say something.

Chapel is always on Wednesdays, and you never quite figured out why...
Don't forget hot lunch.

You celebrate Lutheran Schools' Week, while the rest of the world just sits and wonders
Who could forget tinfoil day?

Dress code violations = breaking the 11th Commandment
JEANS! THE DEVIL IN CLOTH FORM!

At least half the girls in your school were dating the boys from the nearby Catholic high school
Oh, those dreamy De La Salle hunks. I mean, they have lacrosse...

You know that Wednesdays are "easy" homework nights because that's "church night"
And rebellion if some teacher forgets and gives even the smallest worksheet. And most of you didn't even go...

There are only 3 Lutheran churches actually represented at your school
(St. Peter Macomb, Trinity Utica, St. John Rochester)

At least 3 of your relatives and 6 of your friends' family members work in the Lutheran School system

At least 30% of your class goes to the same college
(GVSU?)

All of your male teachers are color blind
Many teachers cannot read this sentence.

Most of your friends have at least one parent that works at the school.
So true.

Half of the young teachers meet their spouse at their first call

Suggesting change (even if its just to the seating chart) is considered sacrilegious.
I heard something about not having a mixer this year...I don't mean to start a riot or anything.

You not only know the all the kids in your grade...but also all the kids in the grades above and below you (even if they attend the sister school above or below you) and their parents as well.

Even if you live in a Blue State, in mock elections at least 85% of the students will vote for the Republican candidate.
(And the people who voted democrat simply did it out of spite)

The computer lab uses modems from the mid-90's.
Windows 98 on a CRT display anyone? And what's a 3 1/2 Floppy Drive? Man that Pentium II is too fast!

You remember those white song books with the reddish-pink print on the front, from which you would sing "The King of Glory Comes" every Wednesday in chapel.
The King of Glory was bigger than Brittany Spears, N'Sync, and The Backstreet Boys combined. There wasn't a day this song was not requested in 2nd grade.

Calling your school anything but "Lutheran High" is sinful.
Don't want anyone getting confused with the poorly dressed people at L'Ance Cruise North or Detroit Northwestern

All of your friends live twenty minutes away from you.
(Farmada, Mt. Clemens, St. Clair, the planet Evan Ames lives on...)

Teachers define you by your older siblings and are never shy to tell you stories about them.
If I was Erik Shull, I would strangle the next person that even hints at Adam, the number 36, or rocket science. Leave the poor boy alone!

And I am sure I will get some heat for this, so here's my disclaimer. This is all in fun. I loved LHN. I loved the fact that I could freely express my faith with my peers at anytime. I loved being able to hear God's word in chapel everyday, and if I was lucky, I might even get some Law and Gospel. I was truly blessed to be able to attend Lutheran Schools my whole life until now. But seriously, why is every male teacher color bind?